Off the pill and ovulation

I finished taking active birth control pills on June 9th, had a withdrawal bleed that next week(no pills)and have been off the pill since then. I haven't had any signs of ovulation (that I know of) yet. Mucus has been very little, no spotting either. There has been a few times I thought I had pain, but went away quickly. According to an ovulation app I use, I have low chance to become pregnant. But that's based on my period being a withdrawal bleed, not an actual period.
My husband and I had sex today, thinking there isn't a chance to become pregnant, because I just got off the pill a few weeks ago. (I've been taking it for over 5 years) I have read that you have better chances of getting pregnant after your first cycle.

So what really are my chances?

PS.if it happens, I'm ok with that, though I've only taken prenatal vitamins for two weeks now and I know you should take them at least a month before getting pregnant.

Thanks in advance!:)

looking for advice on having kids

It has been a long time since I have posted in here. Just got busy with life and all. But some big things have been happening, like we have started talking about having kids. My husband supports that, but is scared(understandably so) and I do still want to have kids, but also kind of scared/nervous in a way. A lot of what what if I'm not a good parent, what if I can't handle that stress, what if we can't have kids and it takes longer that we thought.My husband is very supportive and knows we are in this together, but he has the same worries as I do.

It's what I want yet such a big change. We'd be the first in our group of friends to have kids, so just the fact that that will change our social situation, kind of worries me. Now, don't get me wrong, I am not trying to be selfish about this. I know there are a lot of great things about having kids, which I am ready for. I think what I worry about in that situation is I don't want to forget those friends. I have been on the other side, been forgotten and left out because a friend has been busy with her kid and her friends who have kids. But I also know life will change.

I guess I have heard so many stories of parents being sleep deprived and stories of painful child births and everything, that I am worried I can't handle it. But I guess everyone is different and in the end it is worth it.

Anyway, I guess I am just looking for advice as we start planning for this journey. I plan on getting off my birth control in the next few months. What has helped you get through it? Helped ease worries?

Thanks for listening!

Baby fever

Ah, I am starting to get baby fever and it is driving me nuts! I am 34 years old, married but we live in a small apartment and my husbands job is on the rocks, so he is looking for a new job.
We both said once we have a house, then we can start that part of our lives, but not knowing when that will be drives me crazy.
Plus the pressure for people who really don't understand our situation. Ugh!

One of my friends did have a good point though, it took her a few years to get pregnant, so it could take us a few years as well. She said by the time you get off of your birth control, it could take awhile or it could be fast.

I'm thinking for myself, it would take awhile. I have PCOS, so that kind of plays with the chances of getting pregnant, plus have to get a fibroid removed. I'm not saying that I have no chance of getting pregnant, it's just harder for some with PCOS(Poly cystic Ovarian Syndrome) and might need to be on treatment to help with that. So, with all of these things happening and by the time I get off of birth control and back to regular ovulation, it could be a year or so. I don't know.

My question is, do I even bother bringing this up with my husband? He is someone who likes to have everything lined up before a big decision( first a new job, then house, then kids). Or is it more sensible to wait until all of that at least is in the plans?

husband might be laid off, need advise


This isn't a real relationship question, but has to do with my husband, so hopefully someone can help.

Here's the story:
My husbands job has been pretty shitty lately. There is a lot of childish stuff going on and he works so hard and isn't very appreciated. The business is also probably going to go bankrupt or something, so everything is just going horribly.
Anyway, the other day his boss pulled him aside and kind of gave him a heads up that if one of either of the other co-workers gets the job, they will have to start laying someone off and he might be one of them. This really sucks because he works so hard and it's all based on what some people above him, who actually don't like him for whatever reason, had to say. His boss went to them to get feedback on how my husband is doing, not to his immediate supervisor.
This is a huge problem because there aren't any jobs in the cytotechnology field around here(Madison, wi), so his only options are getting a job that pays less than what he makes now or going back to school, which means more debt but a better paying job in the future.
Not only does this put us in a bit of a pickle but definitely doesn't help his self esteem. He feels pretty low, and no matter what I say to help him feel better, he still feels pretty low. He thinks he's such a disappointment to me, when he isn't. He knows that I want a house and he feels he can't provide that to us, which I know in time we will get one.
I know it's impossible to really know what to do unless you are in that field, just wish I knew what to say to help him. I have told him that he should start looking into either another job or school now, so if he does get laid off, he will at least have a backup plan. He says he will do it, but sometimes I think he won't because he feels so low about everything.

I guess I am just asking if anyone has been in similar situations? What more can I do? Help?


Losing My New Family

Once upon a time my fiance & I were in love, now I'm not sure. Once we got pregnant it seemed like everything changed. His mother who was living with him at the time hated my guts, tried to break us up & even tried to get me to have an abortion. I guess you could say that my fiance was a mama's boy because he always ended up taking her side whenever it came to the matter of her moving out of our one bedroom apartment, until one day she out her hands on me (while pregnant) & I finally called the cops. After that everything had seemed to be a struggle, whether it was coming from an outside force or grew on its own. He always seems to be angry or have an attitude & his desire to marry me is lost & I feel that way because he no longer talks about it like he use too. We were suppose to get married & had a date set over 4 times now & each time he's failed to follow through & be involved in Any way shape or form. It hurts & what hurts even more is we have a daughter together so splitting almost seems impossible for 1 & 2 I don't want to out my daughter through that. I try to talk to him but it always seems to go in one ear & out the next. I don't know what to do anymore, I'm at a loss & need some help.
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Why are you here? - Toxic Teen Relationships

There are times in every teens life where they run into at least 1 toxic relationship. You meet someone and in the beginning the relationship is great! Then at some point the relationship changes, you begin being ridiculed about anything you do. Or your "friend" wants to do something illegal such as stealing money from another teen.

These relationships are defined as toxic due to their nature to degrade you overtime.

So, how do you prevent or stop this type of relationship?

Here's 5 quick tips on preventing/awareness of toxic relationships.

1. Dependent - You find yourself being pressured to spend all of your time with this "friend" or feeling as if you can't do anything without them. WARNING This is toxic!

Solution - Spend time doing things you like alone. Be in control of the time you spend with your friend and if they are unable to understand this, then question if this person is a true friend.

2. Low Self Esteem - Your friend constantly disgraces and discredits you with no constructive criticism. WARNING This is toxic!

Solution - A good friend is an esteem booster and provides constructive criticism. A good friend is truly concerned about your happiness and health.

3. Frequent Arguments - Always fighting verbally or physically with your friend is a clear sign of a toxic relationship.

Solution - Attempt to come to a mutual agreement. If an agreement can't be reached, politely end the friendship.

4. Returning - You cut off a friendship because it was unhealthy and then turned around to go back. We've all been in this situation before and it's a bad sign. WARNING This is toxic.

Solution - When you move on from a relationship, make sure you completely move on and do not look back. In life, you must seek to progress and not digress. Always go forward.

5. Over Protective - Your friend tries to protect you from anything they believe is harmful. While this can appear to be a good thing, it is very toxic. This is the sign of an immensely controlling person who does not like to be disobeyed.

Solution - End this relationship immediately. Over Protective friends have a one track mind and they do not have any plans of compromising.

For more information click here


Originally posted by purebenefit at post
Talks from this brilliant woman Candice have really helped me deal with difficult emotions and circumstances.

"Nothing can make us feel negative, we choose whether we feel negativity."

Mid sems approaching

I haven't been this distracted before a mid semester before. Maybe I was last semester but this is something else. I think I'm gonna be on the Xbox all day long once the exams get over. I've ordered Watch Dogs and Assassin's Creed IV. My best friend, Karthik's birthday is coming up on 9th August but it's supposed to be a secret. I don't get the latest trend of not celebrating birthdays. Anyway I hope both of us can hang out some place after our last exam ends on the same day as his birthday...

You might be wondering what this post has to do with relationships. It doesn't and it's just my first post here. My future posts will be better, hopefully.

And just FYI I'm not gay or anything. Just had my heart broken by the girl I am in love with.

I really messed up

 All my life I have been a pretty reckless and impulsive person when it comes to the choices I’ve made but since I had my son last October I have been trying to break that habit and think before I act and do what’s best for my son. The first thing I did after deciding to make this change was leave my boyfriend, move home and tell my ex that I had his baby. (see my journal for details)

Despite all the drama from our past he just dropped it and said he forgave me for everything I did and he was going to help me raise our son. He has been spending so much time at my apartment helping me out and he has even paid half my rent on more than one occasion. We are getting on better than we ever even did when we were a couple. We don’t bicker, we don’t get at each other, we just have each other’s backs. If I’m not feeling great then he’s there bathing the baby and cooking me dinner and cheering me up. It’s great. It’s exactly what I would’ve hoped would happen. Except for one thing. We have been hooking up like crazy. And that has been better than when we were a couple too, let me tell you. It’s so hot.

I knew that I still had feelings for this boy when I made the decision to reconnect with him. I knew it absolutely had the potential to end up like this but I thought that the new me would handle it maturely and know that getting back involved with him would not be the best decision for my son. But here I am and I don’t know how to stop. I am definitely crushing so hard on him again – whatever sparks went out are absolutely relit now. I’m having gooey thoughts about how we could be and thinking about our past with hearts in my eyes like none of it was painful or messed up or ridiculous. My question is, how can I stop hooking up with him? How can I hit the brakes on this before I completely mess up the good thing we have going on for the sake of our son? We are so young (he's almost 23, I turned 23 in April) and we did not have a stable relationship before we split up and there's just so much potential for this to end in complete disaster.